There used to be a time when Hollywood judged its budding actors and actresses by their talent and on-screen presence. These days, actors in Hollywood are singing a different song.

Want to guarantee an Oscar nomination? Then play a gay/lesbian/mentally retarded character. Its true - after the rousing success of "Brokeback Mountain", actors have decided that they need more edgy roles in order to garner attention in Hollywood. So much so, that Brad Pitt is actually looking to play a gay man in the future. Brad Pitt go gay? Puh-lease...I always knew he was an attention hog, but this is just pushing all the wrong buttons. Sure, we'd love to see him in a gay flick, but not in the ones that he'd like to star in! Girls, not to worry - if playing a lesbian isn't your thing, then just go the old fashioned way and stick with some nip/tuck.

Studios not paying you enough? Not a problem...just pop a badly-produced xxx video of yourself on the Internet and you'll be back in the spotlight(Are you reading this Colin Farell??). Losing your cute factor? Carry a dog with a face that only a mother could love. A bit of a rivalry with going on with someone? Date their ex.

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