A while ago Pwincess started alphabet soup on her blog. So following in her footsteps, here's my version:

A is for ass - If you don't have one, don't call.
B is for bank account - what it takes to win me over.
C is for c*ck - I want a Big Mac honey, no French Fry.
D is for drama - if you can't handle mine, fuck off.
E is for ex - you will be just another number.
F is for fag - call me that and you'll lose a testicle.
G is for guts - what it takes to ask me out.
H is for hot - six pack is a must.
I is for ignorant - the kind I usually seem to attract.
J is for jockstrap - what I rip off with my teeth.
K is for kiss - no road maps allowed.
L is for love - the fickle four letter word.
M is for money - see 'B'.
N is for nicotine - I am a No-Smoking zone.
O is for oral - that says it all.
P is for p*nis - see 'C'.
Q is for queen - you can call me that in bed.
R is for revenge - break my heart, I will break your face.
S is for sex - A+C+2B+K+O
T is for tantrum - I get what I want.
U is for underwear - as tight as they can be.
V is for viagra - if you need it, stick to self loving.
W is for wish - like wishing I call you back.
X is for xxx - I can do things you can't pronounce.
Y is for yes - just assume that I'm right.
Z is for zzz - the sound I make when you start talking.

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