Dates are really fun things. Well, at least they used to be. I remember in my good old college days when one of my girls got asked out by some chap she fancied to go for a movie with him, she went all hyper and said "Oh my god I've got a date with him!" To which I replied "You mean a date date, or a date date?" Thinking of it now I wonder what people would have been thinking of us as we sat there giggling like two schoolgirls staring at a dirty magazine. Whoops...wrong imagery!

However pleasant a date may be, three simple words at the end of a date can bring it all crashing down- "Wanna come up?" I've heard this so many times before, and it rarely means that we're going to go up to watch DVDs. What's even worse is when people add the word "coffee" to the end. "Wanna come up for coffee?" Full points for harnessing the full potential of your vocabulary. And coffee in the middle of the night? Are you that good in bed that I'm going to need coffee to keep up with you? Ladies and gents, the next time you're presented with this utterly useless phrase, just do what George did in an episode of Seinfeld:

Date: So er, would you like to come up for some coffee?
George: Oh no thanks, coffee makes me hyperactive at night

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